He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
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