Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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