who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
