I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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