people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize