he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
