So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
