What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
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