fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
