Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
