Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
