i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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