love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
