Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
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