you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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