I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
