Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
