Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
