I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
