My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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