I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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