the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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