Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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