were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
