just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He shit in the fireplace
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