Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
