I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
