So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
