so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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