Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
