I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
