hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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