I could have mohawked her pubes.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
