Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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