sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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