drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
