Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Randomize
