No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
