I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
We got so high we made milksteak
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
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