I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
