Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
