so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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