I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
