WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
