im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
