sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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