It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
