i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
