The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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