I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
